Cat Dad Steve Austin Is One Of My Favorite Versions Of Stone Cold

By: Marcus Stewart, Contributor

“I wasn’t trying to be a cat dad...But I will accept it because I guess that’s what I’ve become.” -Stone Cold Steve Austin

I’m happy to have lived long enough to witness a lot of unbelievable things. As a comic fan, I never thought I’d see The Avengers successfully leap from comic pages to assemble on the big screen. I’ve been attended to by robotic wait staff at a Japanese diner, blowing my mind as a young kid watching The Jetsons. I’ve even seen Crystal Pepsi make a comeback. But as a lifelong wrestling fan, I never thought I’d see the day Stone Cold Steve Austin would transition from “brawling beer-swilling anarchist” to “wholesome cat dad”. And I’m loving every bit of it. 

Anyone lucky enough to follow Austin’s Instagram over the past few months has been treated to videos revealing that the Texas Rattlesnake has collected kitties instead of championships. The star of his feline federation is Pancho, a male black and white stud running the territory of Austin’s Broken Skull Ranch in Texas. Pancho reigns as Austin's world champion and he'll apparently hold that distinction for a Roman Reigns-length amount of time. “No one beats Pancho,” says Austin in the video where he dubs him the champ. “He’s gonna go undefeated for a long, long, long time”.

Pancho may have competition, though. Enter Macho (an homage to the legendary Randy Savage), an adorable ginger kitten. Although Macho reigns as Austin’s residential Intercontinental Champion, the stepping stone to the world title, he’s still learning the ropes. He doesn’t roam as freely as Pancho; he instead stays within a horse barn as he’s, as Austin describes, “way too small, something will pick him off”.

Images: steveaustinbsr Instagram

As I scroll through the litany of charming videos such as a slideshow of Pancho and Macho set to an instrumental of One Way’s “Cutie Pie”, I regularly chuckle knowing this gushing of kitty love is coming from the same guy who made his name pummeling his 50+-year-old billionaire boss on national television for years. 

For many male wrestling fans, Stone Cold was masculinity personified; a blue-collar, tough-as-nails a**-kicker who didn’t take s**t from anyone. This version of Stone Cold is amusing because it’s such a departure from his wrestling persona. He’s showing a softer, more loving side, not just as a caretaker but as an animal lover. The videos also let Austin showcase the goofier side of his personality, something fans were largely only treated to during his villain run in 2001. Watching Austin beam at Pancho and call him a “solid-a** cat” is equally funny and endearing. 

“I wasn’t trying to be a cat dad,” he says in an interview with Adrian Hernandez. “Now it seems like it’s en vogue to say ‘Oh, he’s a cat dad’. I’m just me. But I will accept it because I guess that’s what I’ve become.”

Austin also proves a cat dad can be just as cool and “manly” as dog owners. Some still perceive the concept of a male owning cats as being soft or “weird”, and Austin showing love to his felines stomps a mudhole into that outdated stereotype. And if you disagree, are you going to tell the former multi-time world champion his cats aren’t cool? If you watched Austin’s return to the ring at WrestleMania 38 in 2022, the “Bionic Redneck” can still open a can of whoop a** today. 

Now give me a hell meow. 

Hello! I’m Marcus Stewart a games journalist, podcaster, and streamer. I've worked in games media for nearly a decade, most recently as an associate editor for Game Informer. I have also been featured on Polygon, Screen Rant, and Hard Drive. When I’m not playing games, I watch way too much pro wrestling and I’ve never met a cat I wouldn’t pet – except maybe a tiger. That probably wouldn’t be a good idea.

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